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My Economic Rebellion
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

I refuse to participate in this economic crisis. I am not the only one, either. Many people are sick of hearing about problems with no apparent solutions.

One of the most horrible consequences of up-to-the-minute reporting by 24-hour news agencies is that a person can be inadvertently, or advertently, brainwashed into believing we are experiencing the economic end of the world. A second Great Depression. A complete destruction of the American way.

Here’s what I think has happened. I, like many Americans, have become an entitled a-hole who thinks this cushy lifestyle I have been fortunate enough to experience for the past thirty years is a God-given right. It isn’t.

Our foremothers and fathers suffered a great deal to pave the way for the lifestyle we have today. They didn’t have Internet access, or video games, or a Little Caesar’s on the corner. They had one rotten carrot on a termite-eaten stick to keep them going and they were thankful for it. At least they had the freedom to pray to whatever god they liked for more carrots and a stronger stick.

Do you know what I am thankful for? That nobody I am close to now has ever had to fight in a war. My fiancé missed the Gulf War, his dad missed Vietnam, and my dad missed Vietnam. Our grandfathers fought in World War II and luckily, lived to tell stories about Parisian prostitutes. (Thank goodness “le clappe” didn’t keep them from having kids or I might not be writing this.)

I have friends who have fought in Iraq, but most are home safe now. I know some soldiers aren’t home, and it hurts, especially during the holidays. But those people have chosen to fight (for which I am eternally grateful).

One difference between what is happening now and what happened in Vietnam, Korea, and World War II is that, because of modern technology mostly, America is able to be somewhat effective without committing our entire population to the war front. (I know the effectiveness is debatable, but that has nothing to do with the average American soldier’s ability to kick ass with some shiny f-ing toys…)

Weight loss due to starvation is not as pervasive a problem in America as weight gain is. We are fat and happy, even if we didn’t get everything we wanted under the tree this year. There was a time when cheese was considered a luxury item because it was so expensive to produce. Go down to the store, right now, and spend $4.00 on a sexy block of cheddar. Do it…because you can!

I understand the fear of losing what we have. I don’t want to lose anything I have access to, either.

But I CAN live without the following items:

Cable television.
Credit cards.
Steak.
Cheese. Wait, I am NOT giving up cheese. (I would rather give up alcohol, to be honest.)

The big question is, does the current economic crisis involve missing Playstation or missing two consecutive days worth of meals? I don’t believe anyone knows that for sure.

All I know is, I am going to have a hell of a garden this year and try as hard as I can to get rid of all outstanding debt so that if the hammer starts to come down, I will not look so much like a gilded nail.

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